Thursday, April 3, 2014

She is threatening my life


Share a problem With Auntie Agatha,  gataedo@yahoo.com, agatha.edo@gmail.com Tel: 08054500626
Dear Agatha, 
I live in a compound that has many tenants. It is always one problem or gossip. Because of my experiences at my former place, I have learnt to mind my business. 
Besides, my job as a sales representative didn’t give me much time to be idle since I live on commission. If I don’t meet my target for the month, I won’t go home with anything.
But even the little I was making from that effort, I lost as the company, went under due to recession. 
The little money I made, I invested in my own business resulting in my inability to  pay my rent. To avoid embarrassment from the landlord who lives upstairs, I decided one afternoon after I came back from selling some of my items, to go to him to explain my situation. That was my second time of going there. After knocking on his door severally without getting a reply, I thought nobody was at home; but on my way downstairs, I heard the opening of a door so went back only to be confronted with the sight of the landlord with my neighbor’s wife coming out of his apartment. The landlord had a towel tied around his waist, while the woman was adjusting her blouse.
I didn’t need anybody to tell me what had just happened between them. 
On sighting me, the landlord asked with irritation what I wanted while the woman made her escape. After explaining my mission to his apartment, he said, he would allow me stay six months free of charge if I didn’t tell the woman’s husband what I just witnessed. 
I didn’t say anything because in addition to my disgust with him, I was disappointed with the woman I thought was an epitome of womanhood. She is this kind of woman who doesn’t adorn jewelry or make up. To make matter worse, her husband is an assistant pastor and the head of the fellowship we organize every month in the compound.
Although, I didn’t intend telling her husband about what I saw but her subsequent conduct is making me have second thoughts. She has been to my apartment to beg and even offering her body to buy my silence. 
I drove her out of my room and warned her never to come near me. The issue now is, she has been going about telling people that I became hostile to her after she rejected my advances. 
This is where I need your help. How do I manage this woman? I don’t want to get myself involved in any issue with anybody in the compound. At the same time, I want to put an end to this woman’s damage of my reputation.
A friend of mine, I shared my dilemma with, advised  I tell her husband my story before she frames me up. To think this is a woman I considered to be righteous and very religious makes me want to throw up whenever I see her. I feel like beating the day light out of her.
I don’t know what to do. Please help me. I have plans for my life beyond them all.
Uche.


Dear Uche,
No matter what she has done or is saying about you, don’t give in to the temptation of beating her. In the first place, she is someone’s wife and also a woman. What if something terrible happens to her when and after beating her? What would be your story? How many people would believe the stories you will tell of her conduct and provocations? How would you explain to her husband, the reason for beating his wife? Not only would it mar your friendship but would make you the topic of discussion in the neighborhood as both the woman and landlord can easily capitalize on it to rope you into something you didn’t do. Given the stories she has been carrying about you, she could turn it  to you wanting to rape her. It would be a difficult task for you to prove your innocence as she has alibis in the landlord and other people she has been carrying tales about you to.
Many innocent people are today wasting away in prisons due to their inability to bridle their temper.
Besides, undue display of temper would present you as a man desperate to cover his tracks. Since your conscience is clear, continue to resist her by always being on your guard against whatever cunning plans she may be conceiving to nail you.
If the house is the kind that has a communal bathroom and kitchen, ensure you have your bath when activity at the bathroom is at its peak and your cooking, when others are also around the area.
Limit your activities to when others are around because there is no telling what her kind of person can do. A woman who has no qualms sleeping with another man in the compound she lives with her husband can do anything to ensure her secrets remain just that. Offering you her body in exchange for your silence should by now tell you what kind of woman you are dealing with. Such women need tact and unusual way to put in check.
Given her conduct so far, she is definitely spoiling for war; don’t fall for her ploy. One of the ways you can deal with her behavior is to walk up to her husband in her presence to plead with him to tell his wife to let you be. If he asks you what the problem between the two of you is, tell him to ask his wife as you cannot recall ever having any issue with her and that you have come for the sake of peace.
Leave the matter hanging. Let her be the one to find reasons to give her husband for her hostility towards you. The boldness to come to her husband as well as the suddenness of your visit will communicate the need for her to be careful on how she proceeds with you. The fact that you didn’t say what she has done orbeen saying about you would make her think twice about engaging you further in any form of hostility.
In addition, it would remind her of her vulnerability and how easily she can lose her home and family if she doesn’t begin to re-order her priority.
Without you saying anything or lifting your hand against her, you would have told her that you are not an easy opponent and if pushed to the wall, you have poison in your fangs and shall not hesitate to use them if the need arises.
However, you have to consider getting an alternative accommodation if you value your life. Between this woman and your landlord, you are in a very dangerous situation; one that could lead to your death if you don’t act fast. If you have any friend or relative that can board you until you are able to gather enough money to pay for rent somewhere else, do sourgently.
You will be naïve to think she is alone in all these. Whatever she is saying has the backing of the landlord. There is also the issue of how far she may have gone to blind her husband, spiritually to her atrocities. There is the possibility that others too know and that her husband is also in the know of her relationship with the landlordbut, could be hamstrung by whatever power is giving her the guts to do what she is doing.
There is also the angle of her not having controls over her action. The landlord for reasons best known to him, could also have charmed her into what she is doing. Either way, your life isn’t really safe in that house. Go before it is too late to do anything about this situation and keep your destination to yourself for security reasons. Most men would kill to have a woman just as most women would do same to protect their secrets.
Always commit your ways to God to avoid getting involved in this kind of situation.
Good luck

No comments:

Post a Comment