Dear Agatha,
I am 23 years, dating a guy who is 26 years of age. This man claims to love me as much I love him, but to my disappointment, I discover he is a certified Casanova.
There was this particular Sunday afternoon I called him and he was rejecting my calls. Baffled at what could be the problem, I called his friend who told me they were not around.
Suspecting something was amiss; I decided to go to his house only to find him with another girl. Not only did he not respond to all what I was saying, but also bluntly refused to acknowledge my presence, instead he walked away with the girl.
When they came back, the girl told me to leave her man alone while my boyfriend stood behind her, laughing.
He later left to drop the girl off in his car. When he came back, I asked him of the meaning of the incident I just witnessed. To my greater shock, he attempted to deny the girl he pushed me aside for.
He described the girl as his ex.
Agatha, he is apologising and wants us to continue even though I still see the two of them together. So what do I do? Should I go to this guy again or forget him.
I need your reply before I go mad.
Jesse.
Dear Jesse,
You really don’t need me to tell you that this boy doesn’t have any respect for you or count you as important woman in his life. Any man who respects the woman he is involved with will never subject her to the humiliation he exposed you to.
Granted, men have the tendencies to stray once in a while, but when caught by the major woman in their life, are usually remorseful and full of apologies. To ignore you and allow the other lady walk all over you while he laughs at your humiliation shows you are not his main woman, but the other lady.
To therefore continue with him is to expose yourself to further ridicule. It would show you are a young desperate girl and a license for him to continue to treat you with open disrespect.
Respect is a necessary tool in any relationship, and once it is absent there is nothing more to be salvaged. It is obvious that he is lying about the nature of his friendship with the other lady. If the other girl is his ex, what business does he still have with her to warrant him ignoring you while she was with him? Why was he laughing at you when she was telling you to stay away from her man? You really should know what to do because the issues are crystal clear and do not need anybody to tell you what your natural reactions should be.
Though if you love him that much and willing to forgive him, make sure he tells you the truth concerning his relationship with the other girl. Also give him a time frame to properly terminate whatever he and the other girl have going to prevent a recurrence of that ugly scene you witnessed the last time.
Unless he does that, don’t expose yourself to more pains by walking away and giving yourself the opportunity to move forward.
Good luck.
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