Friends cash in on frosty relationship to win my love

With Agatha Edo, Email: womaneditor@independentngonline.com,gataedo@yahoo.com or agatha.edo@gmail.com,08054500626 Dear Agatha, I appreciate your help on relationships. Thanks a million for all your help. Please what do I do with my friends who go after my girlfriend asking her to use the opportunity of our misunderstanding to them? The guys going after my girlfriend are all aware that we have been dating for period of four years. She told me everything my friends did and said when we made up. Please advise me on what to do to these guys. Disappointed Friend. Dear Disappointed Friend, Welcome to the true nature of life. Life is like a jungle, where you have to constantly watch your back for predators. Rather, than get angry with what your friends did, be happy that they did it because it has helped you appreciate who your true friends are. If this incident didn’t happen, you will still be under illusion that you have dependable friends, people you can count on to in times of trouble. That they did what they did is an important lesson on knowing who to trust or not. Such friends come into one’s life to remind us to depend more on God than human beings. Now that you know the kind of friends that they are, be wise on how to relate with them. Learn to be stingy with the information you give out about yourself and relationship. Also, use the time you both have to cultivate the attitude of resolving your challenges between yourselves. Your friends’ attempt to come between both of you because they realised the weak chain in your relationship; which unfortunately, you are the one. Whatever information your friends thought they could use in discrediting you where your girlfriend is concerned were got from you. It isn’t everything happening in your relationship that you or your girlfriend should tell friends. The secret of every relationship lies in the ability of the couple to settle their differences privately. It also goes to show that your friends are envious of your relationship; a good reason for you as the man to depend more in your judgment. That your friend said all those things about you underscores the carelessness in which you talk. You are lucky that your woman is disciplined else, you would have lost everything. However, this incident puts your person on the stage. What kind of friend are you? if all your friends were determined to ruin your relationship of four years, then something is really wrong too with your own person. Sometimes friends are a reflection of who we are. What kinds of friend are you to other people? Can they trust you with their women or situation? Look back to the past for explanations on what could have informed your friends’ behaviour as well as their desire to see you get hurt. Can you remember what it is? Going down memory lane will help you know how to proceed with such friends. As a matter of fact, making attempts to fight them would be giving them a reason to say they got to you. Pretend you aren’t aware of what they tried to do to you and your relationship. When around them, cuddle your woman the more, allowing them to witness the kind of deep understanding you both have been able to build over the years. There is no sweeter revenge seeing that rather than succeed in destroying you, they have only succeeded in bringing you both together. It will also help shape you into a better person. Good luck. Library on Agatha’s writings Dear Agatha, I can conveniently say that since 2008 till date that I have never missed reading your column. I have built a library of your columns. What I do is to remove your pages and pack separately so those who make use of newspapers for other things don’t use your page for those things. As a result it is easy for me to pick up one of your columns and re-read any time I feel like or the need arises. I should have reached you in person if I am in Lagos but one day I must surely visit Lagos and come to you. God must surely bless you for the wonderful work you are doing because you have settled a lot of issues that should have set some families apart. Please I need some good friends to chat as well as share ideas with. Would be happy if people contact me through this e-mail address; nwakaigwe@yahoo.com. I am lady, 39 years old, and working in a private company. Chidera.