I detest him after being intimate with him

Dear Agatha, I am 15 years of age in love with a boy who is 17. On the night of 31st of December last year, I got drunk and seduced him against his earlier stance that he cannot be seduced. By the time I finished with him, I lost every feelings I had for him but he has been apologising for what happened between us. Currently, he isn’t feeling too well but I don’t feel anything for him at all. What do I do? Stella. Dear Stella, There is something definitely wrong somewhere. If at 15, when you should be in school, studying and insuring your future, you are busy getting drunk and thinking of how to seduce men; then a whole of things have definitely gone askew with your values. What kind of life are you planning for yourself? What kind of woman and mother are you planning to be? What kind of child are you to your parents? At 15, you have no business falling in love let alone seducing men. What if you got pregnant from that night? What would happen to you and your dreams? If at your age, you begin the journey of aborting unwanted pregnancies, what would you do in a decade from now when you would be only 25 years of age? If at this age you have started to drink to the point of being drunk to seduce a man, I shudder to think of the kind of lifestyle you would veer into when you are a little older? If you have started to seduce men at this age, what would you do when you get into the university or begin work? Have you sat to think of the effects of this kind of lifestyle you are beginning so early on your life and appearance as you get older? Have you thought of how this kind of life can completely deny you of that kind of good life every woman dreams of? No matter what a woman choices are when she is young, somewhere deep in every woman, is the dream to meet her knight in shinning armour. What if you meet him and your past comes up to destroy it, who would you blame? The talebearers or you who made the choice to harm your own life? The pity of the whole situation is the tragedy to you own life at the end of the day. The various men you succeed in seducing have nothing to lose or reputation to protect. You being the woman, has everything to lose because no man wants to end up with a woman with such a vast history of experience. While all these men would have no qualms coming to you for relaxation when they need it, none of them would want to marry you because in their opinion, you aren’t the kind of girl men take home to their mothers. This boy may not know why he is begging you but, it is in your interest you listen to him. You may not be so lucky next time if your victim is smarter and stronger than you. You may end up the victim of men who would gang rape you. What you started as an adventure might end up becoming a nightmare. For your own sake and in the interest of your tomorrow, begin to reconsider your kind of lifestyle because as a young woman, you haven’t even started the journey of adulthood at all. Before it is too late, sit down and reflect on your life. Ask yourself the all important question of what kind of future you want. Look around you for positive examples of women who have made the difference in life. Any thing you do that you cannot openly boost of, don’t do it because at your age you are prone to making mistakes because of the different hormones rioting in your body. Adulthood is about control these hormones. You must develop the will power to restrain them from messing up your life else you end up being the scorn of not just your friends but your family as well who would always mock your inability to bring them honour like those friends of yours who were able to defeat the potency of their hormones. The pride of every woman is her ability to contain her feelings else she becomes the mockery of womanhood. It is never too late for you to begin the process of rebuilding and refocusing your life. It is the beauty of being young; the advantage you have above older women whose mistakes cannot be corrected. Go back to your studies. Your education can earn you any man you want, give your economical powers to take charge of your life. If at the end of all your education, your choice remains dominating men, at least age would have given you that power to do so. But for now, resist the demon of destruction if you love your life. Good luck.