I haven’t been able to move forward after 12 years

With Auntie Agatha, gataedo@yahoo.com, agatha.edo@gmail.com, Tel: 08054500626 Dear Agatha, Although, I am currently 27 years of age, I feel really helpless to admit that after 12 years my boyfriend and I parted ways; I have been unable to forget him. He is my first love. We were classmates and were always quarrelling. To those around us, our quarrels appeared fundamental but deep inside of us, we knew we were only being silly. I actually got to know the strength of his feelings for me through his friends. Till date, I still cherish the moment I heard how much he loved me. But being from a conservative religious family, I was scared of the consequences if my family got to find out about my relationship with any man so I openly snapped at him and said I don’t love him at all. I was deeply hurt but I pretended not to be. My reaction was the same when he attempted it again. My last day in school, I left without saying goodbye. But, ever since, I have been unable to forget him, can’t think of anybody else other than this man. Even after all these years, his memories still bring butterflies into my stomach. Recently, I managed to find him on Facebook and sent him a friend request. He accepted it and wanted us to meet online. Then all of a sudden, he blocked me. It’s really killing me. All these years I have tried to get over him; turned down the interests of others because in him I found a soulmate; each day I get more depressed just thinking about him. All I want to do is to declare my feelings then and now for him. I will accept it if he says to me it is over. But, after all these years, he came back and just shut out me out of his life; this is what is hurting me so much. Please advice me. Bhadra.