Dropping two of my three dates is taxing

With Auntie Agatha, gataedo@yahoo.com, agatha.edo@gmail.com Dear Agatha, I have three dates and love all of them but I have got to a point where I want to choose one of them. But it is impossible. Please help me. Jane. Dear Jane, Why is it impossible for you to settle for one of them? Is it that you cannot do without all three of them in your life or that you really don’t know what you want in a man and from life generally? When a woman has her own dream, where she is going and what she needs to succeed become clearer. The fact that you are in three relationships concurrently underscores your own lack of a clear-cut ambition in life. So, your problem isn’t just about not knowing the right man for you from the three men you are dating, but with your own placement of your future. Honestly, your choice would become clearer if you begin from now to think about your life more seriously than you currently are doing. First, you need to sit back and plan your life. What have you always wanted to be? As a matter of fact, do you have a dream at all? As a young girl just starting out in life, it behooves you to help yourself become successful later in life by laying the right kind of foundation for yourself. You need to do this to get going in life because a time would come when you would become less attractive and the number men interested in you would cease. It is only when you do this that you will be better informed on the kind of man you need to help you propel the engine of your life. In the meantime, you need to appraise yourself, your worth as a woman. If you don’t act quickly and all the three men find out that you have been triple dating, you stand to lose them all because they will regard you as a lady with very little moral values. Besides, have you sat to think of the consequences and the needless stress you put yourself through trying to divide your attention between all these men? Have you ever considered the possibility of getting pregnant and none of these men willing to take responsibility? Would you really blame any of them if they decline? A woman is worth the value she places on her body and person. No matter the attraction each one of these men presents you, you have to learn from this stage of your life to depend on one man. The danger of continuing in your kind of lifestyle lies in your inability to remain faithful to one man. No matter the reason or excuse you have for keeping three men; it goes against all normal norms. A woman who has respect for her body stays with one man. There is no way you will not be confused because the time you would have devoted in a day getting to properly study one man, you deploy into the study of the three men. The result is bouquet of emotional confusion because you haven’t given yourself the opportunity to even know who any of these men is. Every relationship needs attention, understanding, and honesty to survive all the attendant issues that come with two strangers coming together. None of these relationships has character due to your inability to invest the substance, definition, value and loyalty into any of them. The essence of a relationship is to prepare us for the stormy terrains of marriage. If your relationships are characterised by unfaithfulness and lack of trust, what kind of wife would you be to your husband? Would you have the kind of enduring abilities to assist him to weather the storm when they come in full blast? Would you ever grow the kind of patience needed in every marriage to succeed? Would you ever be able to stay in your marriage without having the temptations to look outside for some exciting moments? In addition to all these, you also risk ending up with the wrong man at the end of the day. One way to cure your confusion is to keep your distance from all these men. Take a break. You sincerely need it to make a very good decision for yourself. It just could be none of these men is even your Mr. Right. You may not have noticed the man because you are so caught up in your own games to be real with yourself. There is no way you can really be happy unless you aid yourself to be happy. Good luck.