She Can’t Adjust To Relationship Rules

Dear Agatha, 

I have a girlfriend I love very much. She recently called to break up with me on the ground that she wasn’t ready for the sacrifices a relationship entailed. I don’t know what to do now.

Worried Guy.

Dear Worried Guy, 

Respect her wish to be left alone. You can’t force her to develop feelings or compassion for you. If nothing else, learn to respect her honesty. She has told you precisely what her handicaps are. The choice is yours to either move forward and find happiness in the arms of another woman ready to make the sacrifices for love or insist on getting hurt by someone who has told you she cannot do what you expect from her. 

The truth is not that she cannot make the sacrifice love requires, but she cannot make it for you. She simply hasn’t found that special reason in you and the relationship she has with you to make that kind of sacrifice. 

Give it to her, not many women would be that blunt with you. Instead of feeling bad, appreciate her because she has provided you with every reason to gauge yourself as a man aspiring to be married one day. 

There is a huge difference between being in love and being able to make the necessary sacrifices that go with it. What she wants from you isn’t the obligations that go with what she feels for you, rather contented with staying on the fringes. It takes more than what she is willing to offer to make a relationship work. 

As a man you need a woman who understands you, willing to help you make something out of nothing, who will provide you with strong shoulders to lean on when the outside forces become hostile, who will support your dreams spiritually and physically. Unless a woman has the determination to help her man make it in life, the man would find himself working in vain to make ends meet. 

Therefore you should thank God for making this happen and freeing you from any obligations to her. A wise man in your shoes would turn to God for help in getting another woman who has the fear of God and the right focus you need to succeed to replace her. 

One thing is for a woman to have a vision, while another thing is for her to have the right vision for the man in her life. This is what you should pray for, a woman who has the right vision to match your own dream in life. 

Good luck.