Against all odds she still wants me but her family

Agatha, gataedo@yahoo.com, agatha.edo@gmail.com, Tel: 08054500626 Dear Agatha, I am planning to get married but any lady I met always give me one reason or the other on why a marriage between us would not work. But there is one girl in particular that I met two years ago. I proposed to her this year, but she declined from giving me an immediate answer. Instead she pleaded for two weeks to enable her pray over my proposal to her. After the two weeks, I called to know what her answer would be; to my surprise as well as disappointment, she said a marriage between us wouldn’t work. When I asked why, she told me that she was told, that she would face severe problems from my sisters. She said, though they said, she won’t have problems from me and that I am the kind of man she would have loved to marry, but she won’t be able to cope with the kinds of issues they said she would contend with from my sisters. She also didn’t deny being in love with me. Two days after this conversation, she called to say it was difficult to let go of me. She announced her willingness to marry me, but the problem is that her family is aware of the things they told her about my sisters. According to her, she won’t marry me if her people insist on us going our different ways. Agatha, I love this lady deeply. Please tell me what to do; I don’t want to ever lose her. U.C. Dear U.C., She has been told she won’t have any challenges with you as her husband, but that she will have profound issues with your sisters. If all women before her turned down your request to marry them, then something is really wrong somewhere. The only difference is that she has the guts to tell you what others didn’t. You see some problems are physical while others are spiritual. What kind of sisters do you have? Why do you think your sisters are up to and why would they be the major problems to your wife? This isn’t time for you to go sentimental if you want to resolve the issue of you getting married. You must be able to identify what you think will be the challenges to your wife from your sisters with a view of solving them even before they become monstrous. Are you their only brother? If yes, you have to develop the power to stand as a man even before a woman enters into your home. This is essential so she doesn’t get the blame of turning their only brothers against them. You have to begin to think for yourself, make hard and difficult decisions on your own. While you struggle with gaining your independence from your sisters’ apron, keep your girlfriend out of sight else she will still get all the blame for the change in your character and person. And once they develop an opinion about her, the attendant hatred and jealousy her perceived effrontery at taking you away from them will only get worse by the day. This could even lead them to getting fetish in their bid to get her out of your life. If a lady who claims to love you is very afraid to marry you on account of this prophecy, then you do really have to worry about it. Without you addressing the issues of your sisters first you may not have the presence of mind to enjoy your marriage at all. To achieve positive result, table everything before God. Ask Him for help in your quest to get married as well as expose the kinds of challenges your wife is likely to encounter from your sisters. If you can’t do it on your own, get the help of your pastor. Explain your fears to him. There is nothing that cannot be undone through the powers of prayers. Men’s female relatives are usually the problems women have in their marriages. More often than not, these problems are embedded in jealousy women typically exhibit for each other. Every woman wants to be in charge of a man’s heart irrespective of who that male is to her. This is why mothers-in-law and sisters-in-law are the ones notorious for making their sons or brothers home a living hell for their wives. Unfortunately, the men at the centre of it all suffer untold emotional hardship because of this. Even if there wasn’t this kind of prophecy, every man must take measures to protect the woman in his life. Make the decision from this early that you will give the right to your woman, protecting her from the external influences of the female members of your family. In addition, you must make up your mind to be fair to all, refusing to play the puppet in the hands of any of the women in your life. A man, who is fair, gives him home a fair chance to survive the odds of third party interference. A clarification from God will help you know what to say or do to make your sisters respect your feelings for another woman. All she is asking, is assurance from you is that you will always be there to protect her against your sisters. Once this assurance is given, she will be able to explain to her family members, knowing that she will not have need to come back to them. Her fears are well founded. If she defies her family to marry you against this warning, who will help her stand again? Every woman runs to her family when she runs into problem in her marriage. But a situation she ignores the family’s warning and she later has problems in the marriage, a combination of fear and shame will not allow her go back to her family. Some women have died while concealing their marital problems out of shame from family and friends. Besides, what family would encourage their daughter to go into a marriage that will not give her the required rest of mind? In their shoes, would you encourage your daughter to go into such marriage? More often than not, love isn’t enough to sustain a marriage. It requires much more than that. If a woman isn’t happy, is suffering intimidation and attacks from her in-laws, there is no way you as the man, can ever be happy. This is why you must do everything you can to nip these challenges in the bud. Furthermore, if you are able to discuss with her family, first to admit whatever you find out to be the challenges and secondly to also confide the measures you have put in place to protect your wife from your sisters, they may change their minds. As parents who want the best for their child, they would be happy to know that you are not dismissing what their daughter said about your sisters. Not many men would be that considerate. It is a simple matter of you knowing what you want the most in life and how best to go about it. Good luck.