He won’t stop seeking sex…

With Auntie Agatha, gataedo@yahoo.com, agatha.edo@gmail.com, Tel: 08054500626

Dear Agatha,

I am 20 years of age and in my third year in senior secondary school. I have a boyfriend that is 28 years, an unemployed graduate. I love him very much and praying that God will make it possible for both of us to get married. He really has all the qualities I have always wanted in a man, but he is always demanding for sex. Please help me out.

Funke.



Dear Funke,

Be careful. It is all right to fall in love and have dreams about the future with the kind of man you think would make you happy.

However, there is the need for you at your age to be cautious. There are so many reasons for you to be careful and be watchful of the men you allow into your space.

For you, it is not so much about your age but the academy years you have ahead of you. If at 20, you are in SSS3, it goes without saying that you are just starting out in terms of your educational journey in life.

In the first instance, you don’t even have the basic certificate to pave your way into higher education; the reason you should forget about men for now and concentrate on your studies. You need to pass convincingly well to gain admission into the university. This is because out there are millions of successful secondary school students looking for admission into the university. These days, only the best of the best are admitted into the universities or polytechnics.

This is why you should concentrate all your efforts on your eduation. He has nothing to lose but you have a lot to if you allow him into your body. Not only do you risk getting pregnant but also ending your education at least for the time being.

And by the time you are ready to come back to your educational pursuit, you may not be able to withstand the social shame of going back to finish your secondary shool considering the age you would be at that time.

If this man really loves you, he should patiently wait for you to be ready as he is, finish your study like he has done.

He should know that sex for you now would be a huge distraction. Besides, with what does he plan to take care of you should an accident of pregnancy occur? Any man wishing to be intimate with a woman must have the resources to take care of her when incidences like unplanned pregnancies occur.


Next time he demands for sex, in addition to telling him the kind of future you plan for yourself, ask him how he intends caring for you and a baby if the act leads to you becoming pregnant?

And if he insists on quitting the relationship on account of you not giving in to him, allow him go. Chances are what you think are the right qualities may not be. Don’t be afraid to subject what you feel for him to test. Relationship as with every other thing in life has to be subjected to the different ounces of life.

Be bold in taking your destiny in your hands. There is always time and season for everything. Your season now is to pay more attention to your study and not to place the matter of relationship above what is important to you now. Your ideal man should be more interested in growing your mind than your body.

Good luck.