Her coming heralds era of doom in my life…

Auntie Agatha, gataedo@yahoo.com, agatha.edo@gmail.com, Tel: 08054500626

Dear Agatha,
God’s blessing be upon you for your immensely inspired practical solutions to the many questions that come your way on wide ranging issues on relationships.
I am in a big fix about the lady I planned to marry. We have been in relationship since March 2009 or thereabout.
Two things happened in the course of our relationship and because of my previous experiences with ladies I have decided to use material prosperity at the reign of the woman in my life at any given time as the barometer in measuring the viability of the relationship.
During the course of my current relationship, I narrowly escaped being affected in a recent restructuring that took place at my office, but I lost my ID and other valuable access to allow entrance into my company’s resources.
This wasn’t enough alarm to me but I began to get worried when I asked her to accompany me to an interview venue on a Saturday. To say the least, it was the worst interview I had attended in my life despite being given two opportunities on the same day by the panel to make the right impression. I was as shocked as members of the panel at my inability to deliver. It was all so confusing to me.
Although I didn’t immediately give her the outcome of the interview, but a few days later I did. I confessed to her it was one very bad interview, the first for me. She quipped that it could have been because she went with me. I didn’t understand why she would blame herself for my poor performance. I didn’t count her statement as important then but with time I began to.
Agatha, do you think there is more to this than meets the eye? I have distanced myself from her since she also asked questions and particular dates about when other interview invites would hold including exam dates for recently enrolled postgraduate programme.
Is this lady up to something? Does she know what I do not know? We attend same church where I met her and considered her a wife material. I have decided to keep our relationship in the cooler until I am sure what I am up against. I want a woman who would add value and luck to my progress and not one that would drain my luck.
Agatha, given what I have told you, do you think this lady has a good aura or not? Help me unravel the experience behind accompanying me to an interview and my woeful performance.
Uhe

Dear Uhe,

As human beings, we have our off days; the days when nothing would work according to our expectations; when we would wonder at why a task that we know so well become almost impossible for us to do without helpful hints from people; the kind of days when it is almost impossible for us to remember correctly the alphabets that make up our names.
If one has the misfortune of attending an interview on this kind of day, there is no price for guessing what the outcome of such an interview would be. It is the day mother luck decides to take a break from everything to rest. This explains why an exceptionally bright student would fail an examination, a world acclaimed orator would make a very bad speech, an accomplished chef would cook a meal even a dog would refuse to eat or a writer would never get the first sentence right all day and night.
This has nothing to do with the aura of those around but the way life works generally.
The only thing that works on such days is to rest. Take time off to recover oneself go let off the steams, untangle the muscles tied up by stress and pressures of everyday living.
The wise thing to do is to accept the coded message of the body that it is heading towards nervous breakdown if not given time to rest. It is nature’s way of enforcing the human mind to slow down and take a well-deserved rest.
Unfortunately, not everyone can afford the luxury of resting like mother luck on those days when one doesn’t feel like doing anything. A lot of us are forced by the circumstances we find ourselves to forge ahead in spite of the signs and alarms our bodies are giving us. I am sure if you take time out to think and reflect on your state of mind, you would find out that you were far from relaxed, as you would have loved to for the interview. It could be more of the aura of your mood than the woman who accompanied you for the interview.
The fact that the interview is coming at the time you seem to be in some sorts of emotional crisis resulting from the loss of your vital documents that give you access to the company’s resources, the reality of your near retrenchment, it is only natural that you may not be at your best for this particular interview.
Sometimes too over confidence at our ability contribute to failure. A question that should have been given proper attention more often than not, is given superficial treatment because one didn’t really prepare for due to overestimations of one’s ability.
The fact that you also went for an important interview with your girlfriend underscores the seriousness you attached to the interview. You probably thought it was a work over, something you can just go to grab without much ado. No serious minded man goes into a battlefield with his woman. There is no way you would have asked her to accompany you for this interview if you actually attached a level of seriousness to it. Chances are you messed up due to overconfidence and not because this particular woman didn’t have the right kind of aura to help you. So many times, we are our own worst enemies.
For some panels, the fact that you came with a woman to an interview is enough to score you low because it points at lack of seriousness on your part. What you went for wasn’t a social function or a campaign venue; it was an important official meeting with your prospective employers and should have been treated as such. For some companies, it isn’t the formal interview that matters but the informal things that take place outside the interview room.
More often than not we translate our nature into the persons of other people around us. Granted that we must develop the spiritual alertness to survive life but we must be imbibed by spiritual maturity to know where to look for the source of our problems as well as solutions.
What is your own spiritual burden in life? If your foundational problem is the kind that is stubborn and one that wastes success or opportunities, unless a stronger force and power is applied to neutralise its potency, you will swim in and out of success.
Therefore rather than cry wolf where there is none, begin your x-ray from your family history. Check for clues in the lives of men in your family. Is there a familiar pattern when compared to what is happening to you now?
If there is, ask God for help in overcoming it and freeing yourself from the curse of your lineage.
If peculiar to you, can you remember when it started or the same mistake you seem to be making? Pay more attention to your own mistakes more than the aura of the woman in your life.
Granted, a woman can affect her man positively or negatively, but a man too has to be careful the amount of spiritual corruptions and physical mistakes he allows into his space. Mostly when a man hurts the woman in his life, especially one who is loyal and committed to him, he suffers certain repercussions. It is the way God has made things.
Besides, you wouldn’t be thinking along this line if you took time out to pray about this lady before commencing a relationship with her. The fact that you both attend the same church isn’t enough reason not to pray about your union before going into it.
Had you premised the relationship on God’s words, you won’t have any reason to doubt her or question her suitability for you as a supportive partner. However, it isn’t too late to do things right. If really things are not working for you the way it should be since she came into your life, it may be God’s way of announcing your spiritual incompatibility to each other.
You can only get to know if you really devote yourself to praying to God for His help and direction.
Good luck.