How Possible Is It To Date Multiple Partners?

Dear Agatha,

My problem has to do with this girl I have fallen in love with but who unfortunately is in a relationship with another man. She told me when I asked her out that she would have gladly accepted my offer if she weren’t in another relationship.

The question is if it is possible for someone to date more than one person at a time?

And what should I do? This is the third girl that would be turning down my interest over the same reason. Please what should I do?

Christambass.

---

Dear Christambass,

Yes, it is possible for some people to be involved in multiple relationships but the question should rightly be whether it is right? No, it isn’t right. Anybody who engages in it is termed disloyal and incapable of loving anybody.

The heart is incapable of loving two people at the same time. It will always favour one person to the detriment of the other. When a man or woman is in multiple relationships, in the process of allocating time among the partners, everybody involved with that person suffers.

The essence of going into relationship is to have constant companionship to share ideals and feelings with. Once this is tampered with, and the other person not available to meet the needs of his or her partner, so many issues suffer in the process, which at the end of the day lead to the collapse of the union.

God designed a relationship from the very beginning for two persons because only one rib was extracted from Adam. When a man or woman goes into multiple relationships at the same time, it follows that he or she is stealing into someone else’s happiness and space.

This is why polygamous homes are laced with unnecessary jealousies, hatred, backbiting and dangerous rivalry because no matter how diplomatic the head of the home is, he cannot love every member of the family equally. He would always have his favourite among the wife, the one who carries his original rib.

No man originally sets out to cause confusion in his life at the point he decides to take on an extra wife but finds himself unable to stop the tide of feelings for one woman more than the others.

This is because God never meant a relationship to be between more than two persons. The formation of the human body shows that life itself is meant to be in pair.

There is no way you would be able to enjoy being in a relationship with any of these girls if they had said yes to you because their hearts are committed to other men; men who have the rights to their time and thoughts.

In any of these men shoes, how would you feel if the lady you are involved in has another man outside you? Would you ever be able to accept being responsible for any pregnancy that results from your affair with her? Would you have the confidence to plan any future with her? There are too many complexities associated with relationships, which made it impossible for a third party involvement.

It is unfortunate that all the girls you seem to be interested are all taken up by other men. But that shouldn’t discourage you from continuing your search for the right girl.
These girls are turning you down because they aren’t meant for you. When you meet the right girl, there won’t be any impediment whatsoever.

To help you make the right choice, pray to God. He knows us all, and what we need to be happy. If you talk to Him, He would make things very easy.

Good luck.